Chapter 38: A Song of Chilly Sorrow for Weibo

[Page 1/3]

[I thought I was listening to a story, but turns out I’m still just here for the tea!]
[Every single sentence avoids naming Weibo, yet every single sentence is about Weibo.]
[Astroturfing, privacy monitoring, account bans—good lord, is the streamer tired of living?]
[I’m completely numb at this point; this streamer really has no fear.]
[Streamer, keep a low profile. Whatever you do, don't leave the house.]

Xu Qingfeng took a sip of water and looked at the screen, feigning innocence: "Friends, don't make a scene. What Weibo? I don't know what you're talking about. I’m just telling a story."
"It’s just a thought inspired by the moment. Are you all satisfied with this story?"

[Satisfied? We’re more than satisfied! Streamer, stay safe. If you see a car coming, run as far as you can.]
[Good luck with your 'accidental' demise.]
[I have a premonition that the streamer is going to commit suicide by stabbing himself eight times in the back.]

The program effect of Xu Qingfeng’s broadcast, "The Eighteen Sins of Weibo," was explosive. The number of concurrent viewers topped one million, and screenshots and video clips were flying everywhere.
The internet was going wild. Netizens tacitly started moving the clips over to Weibo, while the entertainment industry fanned the flames.

"Great, the mad dog has finally gone completely insane."
"He’s definitely finished this time."

At Weibo headquarters:
"This bastard really has no fear!"
"Ban him!"
"How? He’s on Shanying now; he doesn't care about us at all."
The executive laughed out of pure anger. "Then make Shanying shut him up. Mobilize all our old connections! Since when do stray cats and dogs get to challenge us?"

However, to the disappointment of the entertainment industry, half an hour passed, and Weibo took no action.

In the live stream, Xu Qingfeng continued his offensive.
"Folks, now that we’re done with that bastard Weibo, let's talk about something else. As you all know, I’m an entertainment streamer. I don't just tell stories; I also sing. Type '1' if you want to listen, or type something else if you don't."

[???]
[Fine, fine, I want to listen, okay?]
[I didn't catch that, streamer, say it again.]
[The price of being uneducated.]
[Typing '1' with tears in my eyes.]

"Picking up where we left off, the beast Weibo was captured by Laozi. At first, he threw it into the Bagua furnace to refine it. It was refined for forty-nine days, yet not only was Weibo unharmed, it was full of energy. Laozi was shocked. After careful consideration, he finally figured out why. Friends, do you know what he discovered?"

[My god, the streamer is giving me flashbacks to being put on the spot by a teacher.]
[Holy crap, there’s a sequel?]
[Okay, okay, you’ve really taken this to a new level.]
[Streamer, tell us already!]

Pineapple Honey shifted her chair closer to get a better look at the drama; she was the chat moderator again today.
Xu Qingfeng glanced at her, his gaze sweeping over her crossed legs, and said calmly, "Because Weibo is of the fire element. Laozi using the Bagua furnace was a perfect match for its properties, but the furnace couldn't refine it. This beast loves high temperatures; the hotter it gets, the happier it is. When it’s happy, it even puts labels like 'Hot' and 'Explosive' on its head."

[???]
[Self-consistent logic—a genius!]
[I get it now, Weibo just wants the traffic.]
[It really has to be you.]

[Page 2/3]

Xu Qingfeng said with a straight face, "But brothers, who is Laozi? He quickly thought of a solution. Yes, as I mentioned earlier, he suppressed Weibo in a cesspit at the bottom of the abyss. Why the bottom of the abyss? Think about it, everyone—why?"

Xu Qingfeng continued to interact with the audience, creating a fantastic atmosphere in the chat where everyone felt involved.

"That's right, because the temperature at the bottom of the abyss is low. Even if it’s excrement, you can't let Weibo have a warm bite, or it will come back to life. Do you get it now, brothers? Only by keeping it stone-cold can you suppress this bastard."
"I dedicate the song 'Cooling Down' to Weibo. It represents my best wishes for them."

[??? Wishes?]
[Streamer, you’ve completely lost your mind, haven't you?]
[Don't do this, streamer, I'm scared.]
[You’ve truly mastered the art of social manipulation.]
[Weibo: Thanks a lot, I guess.]

Xu Qingfeng took a drink to clear his throat and picked up the microphone. By now, Pineapple Honey had already queued the accompaniment.
Over the music, Xu Qingfeng said, "I’ve made some minor adaptations to this song 'Cooling Down.' Just enjoy the fun."

[Crap, don't mess around, I actually wanted to hear a song.]
[Forget the song, the drama is what matters.]
[Sing! Sing well and there will be big rewards.]

As the bleak and melodic music played, Xu Qingfeng began to sing.

["The trending topics slowly grow cold, the hashtags fall and turn to frost,
You linger in front of the screen, exhausting all your attention,
If you don't scroll, you can never forget."]

The viewers in the stream had initially come for the spectacle. In previous broadcasts, the absurdity far outweighed the music itself.
Even though the songs were good, they always felt like they were missing something, like gossip mixed into music.
But hearing this, well—this was music mixed into gossip.

[???]
[“Minor adaptations”]
[My god, my heart aches.]
[Holy crap, putting the lyrics aside, this song is actually great.]
[The lyrics make me want to look away.]
[I’m jealous of your talent.]

The song "Cooling Down" originally had a name that people often used to mock things that had "gone cold," but the original lyrics were unrelated, so he had rewritten the whole thing. The endless stream of question marks in the chat showed just how effective it was.

["The traffic fades, how could you bear to let the trending topics go?
This page is full of confusion, pretending to be indifferent and unforced,
It's all just an illusion."]

The intro to the song was already catchy, and the main verses caused the viewers to quiet down.
The song had such a distinct flavor—it felt even better than the previous ones.

[It’s actually good!]
[Wait, man, do you actually have musical talent?]
[Xinghui is seriously damned!]
[He was definitely held back by Xinghui.]

[Page 3/3]

[Lol, you guys actually believe this? If he didn't buy this song, I’ll do a handstand and poop, and eat it while I’m at it.]
[Here we go again with the 'I’ll eat this if you're right' routine.]
[Use your brains—who would sell a song to this streamer? Do they have a death wish?]
[Couldn't he have just plagiarized it?]

The chat was filled with intense arguments, fans and trolls bickering until they were red in the face.
Without realizing it, Xu Qingfeng’s fan base was growing. Many who had followed along just to troll were gradually drawn in by his streaming style and his music.
Now that he had actual work, the fans stood a bit taller.
In just a few days, Xu Qingfeng’s fan base had exceeded eight million. The growth rate was even more exaggerated than Weibo’s bot accounts, so much so that many people started to believe these were real fans. After all, even buying fake fans didn't look this fake.

["Cooling down, Weibo, creating a river of fakes for you,
Turning into fake followers that pollute me,
Light interactions brush past the user's sleeve,
Each repost flows into the water."]

The melodic rhythm and the clear vocals left the audience stunned.
This song was almost too good. Aside from the lyrics that made it impossible to keep a straight face, there were no flaws.

[Man, you’re making me look like an idiot.]
[I wasn't jealous when you sang 'Tears of the Prison,' because I’ve never been to jail. I wasn't jealous when you sang 'Punishment for Impulse,' because I’ve never been impulsive. But I’m truly jealous of this.]
[Is he actually a genius?]
[Please, just sing the original version!]
[I’m begging you.]
[I don't want to see how Weibo cools down, I just want to hear how the original goes.]

Xu Qingfeng saw the comments but pretended not to. He held the microphone, swaying gently, completely lost in the moment.
This song was genuinely excellent.

["The cooling of heaven's will, a shimmering pool of paid trolls,
Falling into the super-topic, wounding me,
Likes are easy to give, comments are hard to end,
The depreciated heart still holds remnants of past hatred."]

He called them "minor adaptations," but every line pointed directly to the filthiest corners of Weibo.

[Trending topics, paid trolls, super-topics, bot accounts—you’ve stripped Weibo completely naked.]
[I bow down to the master.]
[Having talent really lets you do whatever you want.]
[When I curse people, I only know how to say 'F*** off,' how are you writing songs about it?]
[The worst part is that it’s actually good.]
[I strongly request the streamer to roast ten people every day. Only one condition: one song for each, nobody left out.]
[Good lord, the streamer isn't the King of Hell, I think you are.]
[Even though it’s incredibly mean, I’m totally sold.]