Chapter 21: The Nitpicking Goblin

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What happened in that alley after the brawl? As for whether the monsters in black, those strange creatures seeking medicine, would keep multiplying the longer they fought—well, honestly… It’s none of my business. After all… There’s nothing in it for me. Li Changlu no longer cared. At least, he’d done his part to initiate the conflict, and with that shout, he’d set the stage. That was enough.

Perhaps tomorrow, the social circles of Reason City would explode with posts: “Driver gets into a brawl with a group of cosplayers,” “Video creator personally teaches you how to choose self-defense weapons…”

Returning to the Monster Tavern, he found that night had fallen. It was the depth of winter, and the tavern door was half-closed. Yet inside, the lights shone brightly. As if, in this world of monsters and chaos, only here could the creatures find a place to settle and thrive.

Day and night blurred within the tavern. The patrons, with skins of every hue, shapes as varied as their origins, moved back and forth. The old Eight Immortals table, worn by time, waited quietly beneath the lamps for guests.

Monsters who had completed their tasks and earned their food sat, leaned, squatted, or knelt in groups of two or three at their tables, savoring the life-extending brew they’d earned, regardless of its taste… It was, at least, better than the tavern’s food.

The head chef, Miss Ming Shan, was a beauty. But she was hardly a good cook. Still… She ran a unique business, the only one of its kind. If you wouldn’t eat, you could get lost. That was Miss Ming Shan’s fierce retort to any monster who questioned her culinary skills.

No one dared say… “Damn it, I’ll just leave.” And if they did leave, they always came back—though the next time, their dining posture might be… kneeling.

Li Changlu had just pushed open the door when he felt something wedged against it, making it hard to move. He pushed harder, and with a strange cry, saw a monster shaped like a bamboo pole tumble out from the gap, landing on the floor. On its head bloomed a delicate flower.

“Argument Spirit?!”

Li Changlu, startled, hurried to help him up.

The creature lay motionless.

“Hey, get up. It’s time to argue again,” Li Changlu kindly reminded the inert spirit.

Still, it didn’t move.

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Damn it, has the Argument Spirit learned to play dead now? How outrageous! Li Changlu was annoyed, thinking of ways to teach it a lesson.

“Hey, your monster power just increased!” Xiao Qing, who followed behind, looked at Li Changlu with delight.

“What? I knew this task would boost my power! I can even feel energy coursing wildly through me,” Li Changlu was excited.

“Not really, it only increased a little. Hmm, now your power is at two,” Xiao Qing smoothed her hair and smiled brightly.

Li Changlu’s face darkened. Suddenly, he stepped outside the tavern and closed the door behind him.

“Li, don’t be upset. If you’ve run into the Argument Spirit, it’s just your kidney acting up. Get some rest, don’t avoid it.” Hei Wa saw Li Changlu turn to leave, assuming he was about to act despicably and run, and hurried after him.

Bang!

Li Changlu slammed the tavern door shut.

“It’s your whole family’s kidneys that are acting up—it’s my body, not my kidneys! Please!” Li Changlu’s complaint came from outside.

Then, the door opened again. He winked at Hei Wa and Xiao Qing, saying, “Help him.”

“Not a chance,” the adorable Xiao Qing shook her head, bewildered. Help him? Why?

“He means help him up,” Li Changlu said, exasperated.

“Oh, alright.” Xiao Qing agreed readily, grabbing the Argument Spirit as easily as a chick.

“Put him back over there,” Li Changlu pointed to the door gap.

“What are you up to?”

“I reckon he got knocked out when I pushed the door. My monster power went up a bit, so…”

“So, does that mean every time I squash him with the door, my power will increase?” Li Changlu analyzed proudly.

I’m so clever, aren’t I? At this rate, I’ll set a small goal: squash him ten thousand times.

Heh heh heh, come on, let’s have some fun.

I’ve got time, after all.

Brother Argument Spirit, you just need to hang in there…

Hei Wa listened to Li Changlu’s analysis, his head full of question marks.

Is this even a normal person’s way of thinking?

And so…

In the dead of night within the Monster Tavern, an unfortunate Argument Spirit was subjected to the relentless, merciless crushing of the tavern’s door.

Li Changlu was panting, exhausted.

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Aside from feeling a bit weak in the kidneys and nearly unable to hold out, his monster power was still at two.

Wasn’t it supposed to increase with each squash? Heaven, are you playing tricks on me?

He never understood how his power had risen to “two” in the first place.

He was perplexed.

Just then, the abandoned Argument Spirit woke up.

“What are you doing?” He looked at his battered bamboo body, puzzled as he gazed at the three monsters before him.

“Oh, nothing. Your bones seemed unusual, so I wanted to see if the door could squash you.” Li Changlu clapped his hands nonchalantly and explained. “We tried it dozens of times, and sure enough, you’re a great demon—the door couldn’t squash you at all.”

The Argument Spirit, covered in wounds, exploded at Li Changlu’s explanation.

“This kind of squashing has no soul—can’t you be more attentive? With such unique bones, you should squash my meridians, you know? Do you understand? That’s where the soul lies.”

“And you, clearly a girl, how can you lift a rugged guy like me so easily? It’s not scientific at all.”

“Sorry, me too. We’re all in this together,” Hei Wa awkwardly nodded to the Argument Spirit.

…

“Well… Even though this makes sense, repeated squashing like this is too much—a little girl’s body is too delicate, it’s easy to get hurt,” Li Changlu stared straight ahead, secretly wishing he’d squashed him to death.

Hei Wa and Xiao Qing froze.

Looking at the three monsters before them, they showed an embarrassed yet polite expression.

The Argument Spirit finally nodded in relief, adjusted the bright flower on his head, and staggered away.

His weakened body nearly tripped over the threshold.

“Careful now, you’ve just been squashed back and forth, you’re out of strength, walk carefully,” Hei Wa reminded kindly.

“Mm, you mean tossed around? It’s alright, I’ll go find someone to argue with and recover,” the Argument Spirit looked back, wanted to say more, but shook his head and limped off.

Li Changlu clutched his face, nearly collapsing. “Please, don’t provoke him again.”

After sending off the Argument Spirit, Li Changlu had no idea why he’d even come into the tavern.

All he felt was… Mom, this is terrifying.

It wasn’t until he saw the task board glowing with a faint pale yellow light that he remembered…

He’d come to turn in the task.

Li Changlu hadn’t expected that they’d actually completed this E-level task. He’d accepted several F-level tasks before, all ending in failure—the only one he’d ever finished was capturing the Corpse Ginseng Monster.

But now, he’d completed an E-level task.

And this E-level task even came with a hidden reward.